Have we really had enough? This is the crucial question we must ask ourselves as we prepare to work the First Step in Narcotics Anonymous. It doesn't matter whether or not we arrived in NA with our families intact, our careers still working for us, and all the outward appearances of wholeness. All that matters is that we have reached an emotional and spiritual bottom that precludes our return to active addiction. If we have, we will be truly ready to go to any lengths to quit using.

When we inventory our powerlessness, we ask ourselves some simple questions. Can I control my use of drugs in any form? What incidents have occurred as a result of my drug use that I didn't want to happen? How is my life unmanageable? Do I believe in my heart that I am an addict?

If the answers to these questions lead us to the doors of Narcotics Anonymous, then we are ready to move on to the next step toward a life free from active addiction. If we have truly had enough, then we will be willing to go to any lengths to find recovery.

When we were using drugs, our spirits slowly eroded as our disease progressed. We compromised our beliefs and screwed over anyone who got in the way of our self-serving plans. The journey from desperation to spiritual awakening is a long and storied path for each of us.

A pink cloud may protect us from the jagged edges of life on life's terms for a time, but reality sets in sooner or later. Eventually, we will walk through the death of someone close to us or perhaps go through a painful divorce with years clean. We each deal with loss differently. Our initial response may be to avoid our feelings, instead seeking comfort in food or sex or gaming. With time, we learn to rely on a power greater than ourselves and our support group to navigate overwhelming feelings. When we let go and surrender to the process, our spirits are free to awaken.

Grace teaches us to let things unfold naturally and let go of the illusion of control. We're less invested in outcomes, and we focus instead on aligning our will with the greater good. We open our minds to the possibilities and pay attention to opportunities as well as to closed doors. We live in the moment and enjoy the freedom that comes with grace.