Many of us came to NA emotionally shattered. Years of using people and allowing them to use us had taken their toll on our ability to trust anyone, ourselves included. But the love and acceptance we found in Narcotics Anonymous encouraged us to reach out and get close to others.

The longer we stayed clean, the more we began to long for greater intimacy with our loved ones. We began reaching out in deeper, more meaningful ways, even though we might get hurt. Despite our fears of rejection, we decided to risk revealing ourselves, our beliefs, and our needs. We decided to let down our defensive walls.

The freedom we've found has been worth the risk involved. We know there is still work to do before we will be completely free of the barriers built by years of active addiction. But by reaching out to other addicts and allowing them to reach out to us, despite our human failings, we have come to know that we have a great capacity for love and intimacy. When set free of their restraining walls, our hearts hold great power.

More often than not, a last-ditch effort to stay out of jail, keep a job, or hang on to a relationship drives us through the doors of NA. We'd stopped using plenty of times before but staying stopped seemed beyond us. We knew something had to change, and, honestly, we had nothing to lose.

When we looked around at that first meeting, we saw people who understood our plight because they had been there. They'd experienced the high price of low living. The NA program worked for them; maybe it will work for us, too. Desperation may have brought us to NA, but inspiration keeps us coming back.

Trust hadn't been on our radar, but we are somehow willing to accept a few suggestions. Just a few days in, and we're committed to attending a meeting a day for 90 days. We even reach out to other members between meetings. With each passing day, we feel a little better and trust in this NA way a little more. And our actions show it.

We've begun to trust the process, but we'll need a guide—a sponsor—if we want to give this a fair shot. "You don't have to trust everyone," we're told, "but you've got to learn to trust someone." This seems like solid advice. The source, a more experienced member, seems trustworthy. "How about you?" we respond. "Will you sponsor me?"

It takes time for most of us to shed our armor, but sponsors have a way of gaining our trust little by little. "One of us shares some truth about our life and experience, and the other returns the favor," as one member put it. In the process, we develop trust and, eventually, intimacy. It's a pattern of behavior we can replicate in other relationships, as sponsees, sponsors, partners, and friends.