We all rationalize. Sometimes we know we are rationalizing, admit we are rationalizing, yet continue to behave according to our rationalizations! Recovery can become very painful when we decide that, for one reason or another, the simple principles of the program don't apply to us.

With the help of our sponsor and others in NA, we can begin to look at the excuses we use for our behavior. Do we find that some principles just don't apply to us? Do we believe that we know more than everyone else in Narcotics Anonymous, even those who have been clean for many years? What makes us think that we're so special?

There is no doubt, we can successfully rationalize our way through part of our recovery. But, eventually, we must squarely face the truth and start acting accordingly. The principles in the Twelve Steps guide us to a new life in recovery. There is little room for rationalization there.

If honesty really is a commitment to reality, then we addicts definitely need help in this arena. Many of us gamed reality for as long as we can remember. A member shared, "We tend to not see things as they are. We see them as we are." Often our version of the past isn't necessarily reliable. Today we can be confused about how much to say that's on our minds and who to say it to—and then end up oversharing or being needlessly brutal in our truth-telling.

By working the Twelve Steps, we address our past and present commitment to reality. Through that process, one truth becomes apparent: No matter how hard we try, we can't make something true that isn't. Denial can be fierce and keep us running for years, but ultimately, it's not more powerful than reality. The member quipped, "Reality will always catch up with you. Hopefully it's just your spouse, a government agency, or a pair of handcuffs, not the morgue."

We carry our commitment to reality with us as home-group members and in service. Tradition One tells us to consider NA's common welfare, not just our own. Our commitment to reality can be complicated by having to consider the realities of our fellow group members. Does this mean then that we'll all have the same perspective on how to put our common welfare first? In a word, no. But what we can do is stay committed to spiritual principles in our group work.

There will be communication problems and differences of opinion. We can start by being real about that and accepting our responsibility as committed NA members to face these challenges. As individuals, we can commit to admitting when we're wrong or when we don't know something. We can be candid about caring deeply about the outcome of a particular decision. We can be real about the fact that we don't remember every single detail about the past and we can't predict the future.

When we can make an honest self-assessment and realize that our self-centeredness is working against our desire to serve, then we have taken a great step toward shedding our denial and embracing reality.